Groundhog’s Day #… Lost Count

Haggai 1:1

A Call to Build the House of the Lord- Haggai, is it right that you bastards live in your nice little houses, while My (God’s) house lies in ruins? Fuck no. Build that shit. Have you not noticed that “you have planted much, but harvest little. You eat but never have enough. You drink, but never have your fill. You put on clothes, but are not warm. You earn wages, only to put them in a purse with holes in it. 1:6” That shit is because of Me. I’m mad about my fucked up house: fix it.

So the people banded together and started to fix God’s house.  A literal house, with wood and stuff. This took place under the rule of the Persian King, Darius.

The Promised Glory of the New House- Guys, this house is going to be awesome! Does anyone even remember what the old one looked like? No?Ask old people; someone has to remember. Have no fear, just work hard and build My house! I will protect you!


Blessings for a Defiled People- Remember how hard you were working, and how I fucked it up for you? That’s because I was mad at you, but that can all change now that I’ve punished you really, really badly. We are gonna have the best time!

Zerubbabel the Lord’s Signet Ring- I’m going to make you guys, what remains of My people, like a signet ring. Meaning I chose you. And I’m going to destroy everyone I didn’t choose. Like, really destroy them.

The end!

Next up, Zechariah! And guess what?!?!!? We’re almost done with this repetitive prophet stuff! Two more books before we arrive at the New Testament and get Jesusy up in here!


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